‘Addictions . . . ’

Addictions . . . we all have them . . . it’s just that some are not as easily recognizable to the general public or our closest friends.

I have a friend who is struggling through one even as I type. I have been witness to many things in my life time, but until now, I have not had a front row seat to see first hand how difficult the very physical struggle can be to ride one’s self of a mainstream addition.

. . . big sigh . . . I find that in all things along the journey of ‘ME’, God is showing me very real examples of the many struggles I go through in my own life. Until this latest, I did not realize how very real my own addictions are.

A few weeks ago, when it became very real with this friend, I felt that crack in that foundations again ~ you know, when your perceived reality is shaken a bit by something you think could not be possible. Then, when you realize that, ‘Yes – it is quite true’, the world around you starts to melt away and the floor beneath you becomes more unstable. You begin to see all too clearly that the thing others struggles with, is the very thing you struggle with – only under a different mask.

This dear friend recently surrendered to a long-time addiction and has since felt the damages that have come along the way. In the very manner this addiction manifest itself in the physical form (taking hold of the victim and making the body become a slave to it’s presence, this addiction also manifested itself in the form of destroyed relationships, jeopardized employment and stolen securities. Try as they might, this friend could not simply ‘stop’ for the addiction found a way of creeping in. It literally controlled my friend and when this friend tried to stop, the physical being would go through very real manifestations, like ‘the shakes’ and a clouded mental capacity making it nearly impossible to stop.

One night, as I tried reasoning with this friend yet again (one cannot take the substance away, the addict has to push it away for the healing to begin), something became very evident to me. In the very manner I protested – TWO things flashed before my eyes – areas of my life that I have ALLOWED CONTROL over my better judgement.

It’s almost as if a huge spotlight was held over my head . . . and isn’t that the way it says it will be (‘judge NOT lease you be judged’). For the first time, I realized I was holding onto things in the same manner that this friend held onto the alcohol. The difference . . . mine was more a relationship and a mode of operation . . . not mainstream in the least – but still addictions in their own right. What some would perceive as ‘normal’, I have recognized as areas that ultimately hold me back – never to the extreme . . . but enough to recognize the subtle damages over TIME.

In the very manner my friend is having to follow – the 12 steps to recovery - I have vowed to do the same with these areas in my own life – the first one being the admission that I am not going to allow these additions to go on.

So, to the many who want to dig a little deeper to find the root of their existing problems, know this – among what might be a huge pile of negative debris from the years lived before, I can promise you that there will ALSO be a beautiful TREASURE that will be WORTH holding onto. I pray that you gain strength to release the things that are holding you back and also endurance to sustain you when you need to reach out as that brass ring is presented before you.

These are the original Twelve Steps as published by Alcoholics Anonymous.[8]

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.

Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His Will for us and the power to carry that out.

Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.