It is one of the severest tests of friendship to tell your friend his faults. So to love a man that you cannot bear to see a stain upon him, and to speak painful truth through loving words, that is friendship. -- Henry Ward Beecher
I recently shared a mouthful with someone I have grown close to. I opened by choosing my words carefully in the hopes that my heart would be revealed. I shared that it was only because I’ve had to do my own overhauling in these areas that I was able to recognize and share. What ensued was a shift in reception – denial that things were not needed in this area and what began as a meeting of hopeful progress, quickly turned into rejection and edited reception. What needed to be said was NOT wanting to be heard. Rather than addressing some of the issues – the things we often put band aids on to just get to the next day, I dug deep to get to the root of the many problems. I was told I didn’t need to do this. When I shared that things would continue as they were unless some major changes were addressed, I was given the cold shoulder and told not to worry about it. People hear ONLY what they want to hear and see ONLY what they want to see.
Like all things, it got me thinking - how far is too far as it pertains to seeking change . . . how far is too far in the realm of friendships?
I believe one that walks in truth hold much integrity. . . I also believe that he/she often holds much loneliness in doing so. I was tossed a question a long time ago – one of those pondering hypothetical questions on the placement of perceived selfishness: ‘Is it more selfish to SHARE a truth about something – relieving the sharer from the burden of that truth – but ultimately placing burden on the recipient – OR – is it better to NOT SHARE, holding the burden but allowing the recipient to walk in an state of ignorant bliss?’
I tend to act on the first and maybe this IS selfish in some way because it eventually spares me the pain of having to re-address the person’s embarrassment that ultimately ensues when the truth is finally revealed. TRUTH ultimately wins out, you know.
Friends who instinctually ‘groom’ others are often sneered at. Guilty. I just want people to be the very best they can be and as Mr. Beecher points out in the above quote - I cannot ‘bear to see the stain’ upon one that I care about and will risk sharing painful truths so that he/she may ultimately shine. Yes, if you have a fleck of food in your teeth, I will tell you – not because it’s annoying to me – but because I want to spare you the insecurities of discovering it yourself much later in the bathroom mirror and forever wondering who had seen you with that fleck. I am the one that that has to look away at an embarrassing situation – not because it causes me embarrassment but because it cause me heartache as I seem to literally FEEL the other’s humiliation.
Perhaps this was Paul’s thorn in his side – a continuous nagging personal hurt for those that could be so much more if they would just seek truth or at lease have the will to change. I often go back and forth with that scripture thinking it was this or simply his own ‘self doubt in whether he he did everything possible in the power that God allowed him’ – either way – it’s a continual ‘thorn’ as I struggle with similar pains.
While I am fully aware that I certainly do not have all the answers - that people will always have comfort zones they will not want crossed, I will most likely end up crossing some of them when internally prompted to do so because while I will forever risk moments of loneliness from doing so, I will do so because I walk in truth . . . because I have integrity . . . and because I am a friend . . . .
Until next time . . .
Saturday, January 5, 2008
'Titles'
“I made the most of my ability and I did my best with my title.” - unknown
Titles are nothing without a sound understanding of the PURPOSE behind them.
Gearing up for my new job I – ok, already I need to divert to another thought – ugh…. I really have to remember what was in my coffee today – for the thoughts, they just keep a coming . . . it’s all good, like McDonald’s ‘I’m loving it’, but I have to digress simply to definitions again:
SEVERAL revelations came from this recent pursuit for the ‘perfect job’. It got me thinking about what that word really means. JOB is defined as: anything a person is expected or obliged to do; duty; responsibility. EMPLOYMENT is defined as: an occupation by which a person earns a living; work; business.
First and foremost, was the realization that my ‘perfect job’ has been mine from the beginning – WORKING to keep myself open and moldable to ‘A WORK’ that is being done within me so that I may, in turn, do that which is continually assigned – that is my JOB – what I am called to do - period. Along the way, I am called to many employments that will also allow me PROVISION for the air that I and those that have been entrusted to me breath while we are here. So, in this aspect, a correction is to be made . . . my pursuit of this current “employment” has allowed me much in the way of revelations.
OK, the train has reentered the station again so I continue with my initial thoughts . . .
GEARING UP for my new 'employment', I was asked what I wanted on my business cards – “same as the last or do you want to change the title?” To which I said, “I’ve never been big on titles per say, only understanding what it is you see my position to be. My performance will reflect that which you are needing from this position – you tell me what you see this position to be.” (I had already locked in my salary so it truly didn’t matter at this stage of the game in that respect).
So a title was chosen and the cards have been ordered but all this prompted more thoughts as I focused on the sentiments I had shared. Many spend their whole life in pursuit of that ultimate title – only to have it mean NOTHING in the performance they ultimately give. So truly, I ask . . . WHAT IS IN A NAME?
One of my favorite movies is “Sommersby” – ok so Richard Gere is not bad to look at but it is more for the message of that movie – the need to live up to a name that holds HONOR. I want more than anything to have INTEGRITY in all I do – no matter what title I have before my name – Education Coordinator, Mother . . . and so forth. I, like all of us wear many HATS during the day – will have many titles in my lifetime and want to be able to have the highest form of integrity under all those titles.
Until recently, I have always struggled with truly understanding the concept of the Trinity. While I will not claim to fully understand anything of God, I will claim that when I look again, having an understanding that we ALL wear many titles, it becomes a little easier to see. At the risk of causing heart failure in many, I will use the analogy of myself – stating emphatically that I fully understand my limitations and my unworthiness in this comparison - but if we are truly to be imitators of GOD . . . to be Christ-like in our pursuit of the kingdom: I AM . . . . woman . . . MOTHER . . . DAUGHTER . . . and SOUL.
My TITLE . . . depends upon what God is looking for in me in that particular employment.
Until next time . . . choose integrity in ALL you are.
Titles are nothing without a sound understanding of the PURPOSE behind them.
Gearing up for my new job I – ok, already I need to divert to another thought – ugh…. I really have to remember what was in my coffee today – for the thoughts, they just keep a coming . . . it’s all good, like McDonald’s ‘I’m loving it’, but I have to digress simply to definitions again:
SEVERAL revelations came from this recent pursuit for the ‘perfect job’. It got me thinking about what that word really means. JOB is defined as: anything a person is expected or obliged to do; duty; responsibility. EMPLOYMENT is defined as: an occupation by which a person earns a living; work; business.
First and foremost, was the realization that my ‘perfect job’ has been mine from the beginning – WORKING to keep myself open and moldable to ‘A WORK’ that is being done within me so that I may, in turn, do that which is continually assigned – that is my JOB – what I am called to do - period. Along the way, I am called to many employments that will also allow me PROVISION for the air that I and those that have been entrusted to me breath while we are here. So, in this aspect, a correction is to be made . . . my pursuit of this current “employment” has allowed me much in the way of revelations.
OK, the train has reentered the station again so I continue with my initial thoughts . . .
GEARING UP for my new 'employment', I was asked what I wanted on my business cards – “same as the last or do you want to change the title?” To which I said, “I’ve never been big on titles per say, only understanding what it is you see my position to be. My performance will reflect that which you are needing from this position – you tell me what you see this position to be.” (I had already locked in my salary so it truly didn’t matter at this stage of the game in that respect).
So a title was chosen and the cards have been ordered but all this prompted more thoughts as I focused on the sentiments I had shared. Many spend their whole life in pursuit of that ultimate title – only to have it mean NOTHING in the performance they ultimately give. So truly, I ask . . . WHAT IS IN A NAME?
One of my favorite movies is “Sommersby” – ok so Richard Gere is not bad to look at but it is more for the message of that movie – the need to live up to a name that holds HONOR. I want more than anything to have INTEGRITY in all I do – no matter what title I have before my name – Education Coordinator, Mother . . . and so forth. I, like all of us wear many HATS during the day – will have many titles in my lifetime and want to be able to have the highest form of integrity under all those titles.
Until recently, I have always struggled with truly understanding the concept of the Trinity. While I will not claim to fully understand anything of God, I will claim that when I look again, having an understanding that we ALL wear many titles, it becomes a little easier to see. At the risk of causing heart failure in many, I will use the analogy of myself – stating emphatically that I fully understand my limitations and my unworthiness in this comparison - but if we are truly to be imitators of GOD . . . to be Christ-like in our pursuit of the kingdom: I AM . . . . woman . . . MOTHER . . . DAUGHTER . . . and SOUL.
My TITLE . . . depends upon what God is looking for in me in that particular employment.
Until next time . . . choose integrity in ALL you are.
'Benefit Packages'
‘The lamp of the body is the eye. If therefore your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If therefore the light that is in you is darkness, how great is that darkness !” (Matthew 6:19-23)
It’s no wonder that Scripture has many references to the eyes. God is asking for us to see HIM in all things among the countless lessons. The scripture above holds many truths but for this particular entry, I will focus on one aspect of it.
One’s perception is one’s reality – obviously this continues to be my favored soap box as this message rings so very loudly in my life these days. Modern day ‘life-changers’ have a similar message that they preach – “be positive, see the good in all you do”. To the one seeking, there the answers will be found and a PEACE will eventually surpass ALL understanding because the heart will learn to receive.
The name of this blog should reveal it all – I seek PURPOSE in ALL that is presented to me – in every little THING I do – in every person that comes into my realm – in every TASK that I am called to do.
Many a good Art Teacher will inform his/her students, “That which you go in looking for, is what will ultimately be SEEN in any work of art”. Our eyes are the windows to our hearts. I go in looking for the lesson that will hopefully refine my heart. And such is what I found – a number of times with the many challenges that faced me in this season of employment seeking. In my search for employment, the one thing that ranked top on everyone’s list of questions was, “What kind of benefits will you get?”
My initial reactions were that of defense at first – a search for justification because try as I did, the doors would just not open to a position of substance that would efficiently provide for my needs – needs that have been stripped to basics – not much fluff for this gal lately. Throughout this whole search I did what I had to do which meant taking on odd jobs while I searched diligently for a full-time position that would allow me the utilizations of my giftings as well as give me a good salary. When a position finally became available that placed me in a higher bracket – but still only just met my necessities, I had no choice but to take it. It was a job that filled every criteria which I stated in the last blog - but it offered NO BENEFITS, at least those benefits that mere man has set his eyes to recognize. Just straight pay – nothing more in the means of insurance or paid holidays and such.
As this employment is being replaced by the one I just recently accepted, I offered to help find and train my replacement. I had shared with this friend - the friend that I had recently reconnected - one that was being considered for my replacement - that ‘benefits’ come in many forms. I wanted her to not be dismayed by the lack thereof but to realize something that I had along the way. While this position does not currently offer the standard benefit packages (he hopes to offer this in time), it offers many benefits to the one that tilts his/her head to see it. It offers an opportunity to HONE current skills, an opportunity to gain NEW skills, it offers NUMEROUS opportunities that strengthen resourcefulness, it offers exceptional networking opportunities – something that, in this day an age, is quite priceless, it offers a casual work environment so there is no need to purchase special work attire, it offers flex hours so one can come and go as one pleases as long as the work is completed and finally – it offers a PAYCHECK – as opposed to NO PAYCHECK – and one should view that as a HUGE benefit.
I shared that, not only did this short employment give me the above mentioned, but it SPECIAL TRAINED me for this current position I now have – one that I fully believe I landed BECAUSE of the Crash Course of knowledge I had to gain to do that other job. (The perfect job, at the perfect time, for the perfect purpose . . . )
As you go forward today, I am hoping that you will choose to SEE the MANY BENEFITS that your day, your position, your relationships offer you . . . . continue to make them good.
It’s no wonder that Scripture has many references to the eyes. God is asking for us to see HIM in all things among the countless lessons. The scripture above holds many truths but for this particular entry, I will focus on one aspect of it.
One’s perception is one’s reality – obviously this continues to be my favored soap box as this message rings so very loudly in my life these days. Modern day ‘life-changers’ have a similar message that they preach – “be positive, see the good in all you do”. To the one seeking, there the answers will be found and a PEACE will eventually surpass ALL understanding because the heart will learn to receive.
The name of this blog should reveal it all – I seek PURPOSE in ALL that is presented to me – in every little THING I do – in every person that comes into my realm – in every TASK that I am called to do.
Many a good Art Teacher will inform his/her students, “That which you go in looking for, is what will ultimately be SEEN in any work of art”. Our eyes are the windows to our hearts. I go in looking for the lesson that will hopefully refine my heart. And such is what I found – a number of times with the many challenges that faced me in this season of employment seeking. In my search for employment, the one thing that ranked top on everyone’s list of questions was, “What kind of benefits will you get?”
My initial reactions were that of defense at first – a search for justification because try as I did, the doors would just not open to a position of substance that would efficiently provide for my needs – needs that have been stripped to basics – not much fluff for this gal lately. Throughout this whole search I did what I had to do which meant taking on odd jobs while I searched diligently for a full-time position that would allow me the utilizations of my giftings as well as give me a good salary. When a position finally became available that placed me in a higher bracket – but still only just met my necessities, I had no choice but to take it. It was a job that filled every criteria which I stated in the last blog - but it offered NO BENEFITS, at least those benefits that mere man has set his eyes to recognize. Just straight pay – nothing more in the means of insurance or paid holidays and such.
As this employment is being replaced by the one I just recently accepted, I offered to help find and train my replacement. I had shared with this friend - the friend that I had recently reconnected - one that was being considered for my replacement - that ‘benefits’ come in many forms. I wanted her to not be dismayed by the lack thereof but to realize something that I had along the way. While this position does not currently offer the standard benefit packages (he hopes to offer this in time), it offers many benefits to the one that tilts his/her head to see it. It offers an opportunity to HONE current skills, an opportunity to gain NEW skills, it offers NUMEROUS opportunities that strengthen resourcefulness, it offers exceptional networking opportunities – something that, in this day an age, is quite priceless, it offers a casual work environment so there is no need to purchase special work attire, it offers flex hours so one can come and go as one pleases as long as the work is completed and finally – it offers a PAYCHECK – as opposed to NO PAYCHECK – and one should view that as a HUGE benefit.
I shared that, not only did this short employment give me the above mentioned, but it SPECIAL TRAINED me for this current position I now have – one that I fully believe I landed BECAUSE of the Crash Course of knowledge I had to gain to do that other job. (The perfect job, at the perfect time, for the perfect purpose . . . )
As you go forward today, I am hoping that you will choose to SEE the MANY BENEFITS that your day, your position, your relationships offer you . . . . continue to make them good.
Thursday, January 3, 2008
'Blessings in Disguise'
Switched jobs recently. And – YES – this too holds many fine lessons. I say this as the smile broadens on my face. Maybe it’s because I have been granted a few days ‘rest’ just recently that I can see the bounty of blessings that are right before my eyes. Perhaps it is more of a basic truth that when one is finally stripped away of all the comforts of a former life, bare essentials reveal hidden bounties. All I know is that, for whatever reason, I have been granted a sort of ‘front row seat’ to the inner working of the Greatness above as it pertains to the many revelations I now see.
A few years ago, fresh out of the bullpen of a stay at home career, I was granted employment on my first interview out – a blessing coming out of a rather arduous trek through divorce and major life changes. However, only partially sole seeking at the time, I took this ‘gift’ and later tossed it aside as I perceived myself to have other destinies. Very much in the manner of Jonah, many great things were had because I allowed myself to get swallowed by this fish, so much so that I often still question whether I wasn’t truly meant to take this turn. However, looking to the present, and then to the past, I see an alignment that had happened – not in my own time – but rather that of the Masters – for the job that I first landed was near the town that would eventually be called ‘home’. Had I only had a little more faith in the manner – while many lessons were learned because of my derailment, I now wonder how many MORE would have been received had I just stayed on course?
Such are the lenses I use to view my present situations. Due to some adverse actions, all efforts to build an organization (questionable derailment) were thwarted and I found myself starting again from ground up – only this time, rather than my personal life it was my professional life. So, back to classifieds as I sought anxiously to rebuild. I was thrown into a series of challenges that I believe were there to cause me to SEEK provisions from the true source. Many a tear I cried as I, a recovering control-freak, had to sit on my hands and NOT make things happen in the world that wrapped around me. But each new position brought just enough provision and with provision, many new abilities. This most recent one seems to take the cake though. As my recent work at an orchard was drawing to a close due to the season ending, my anxious heart was stayed as my boss emphatically stated, ‘Do not be anxious for the perfect job will come at just the perfect time and it will be the perfect provision for you!’ Sure enough – in the 11th hour, this job came. I was doing what I enjoyed – re-using much of my former giftings, in a casual environment, flexible schedule, amazing networking opportunities . . . But to my dismay, the compensation was questionable as it was an independent non-profit and it was struggling for funding. Lessons learned hard, I started to grumble – but thankfully recovered quickly when all of a sudden a strange series of events took place. I had gotten a call denying funds – I felt my heart sink but mustered up giving it to God then, within the hour my personal cell rang – it was another company that I had applied to but never heard from – they were doing a second call for interviews ‘something’ had fallen through with their first choice – to which I agreed to take an interview – shortly after this – one of the girls I worked with, laid a resume upon my desk, “know that you have filled this position but you may want to keep this gal handy – she looks like she could be a good candidate for the future . . . “ Long story short, I went on the interview, was able to share something that I had just had to take a crash course on learning about – which I believe helped land me the job. The resume that was placed on my desk was followed up with and not only did she go in for an interview (waiting to hear what happened) but she and I developed a friendship while I was strategically trying to interview her without bringing her in physically. I found another friend of mine that had interviewed for that job previously and reconnected with her as she has already started working with them on a temp basis and just today, at my new job – I discovered several projects that are very similar to the many I had just trained for with this past job. It truly WAS the perfect job as it trained me for the next one waiting for me.
Could it really be that easy? Could it be that all we really need to do is just place our trust and walk in faith that we will eventually be brought to the many things that are just waiting to be given to us? All I have to say it . . . make good choices today . . . you might be surprised by what it blesses you with.
A few years ago, fresh out of the bullpen of a stay at home career, I was granted employment on my first interview out – a blessing coming out of a rather arduous trek through divorce and major life changes. However, only partially sole seeking at the time, I took this ‘gift’ and later tossed it aside as I perceived myself to have other destinies. Very much in the manner of Jonah, many great things were had because I allowed myself to get swallowed by this fish, so much so that I often still question whether I wasn’t truly meant to take this turn. However, looking to the present, and then to the past, I see an alignment that had happened – not in my own time – but rather that of the Masters – for the job that I first landed was near the town that would eventually be called ‘home’. Had I only had a little more faith in the manner – while many lessons were learned because of my derailment, I now wonder how many MORE would have been received had I just stayed on course?
Such are the lenses I use to view my present situations. Due to some adverse actions, all efforts to build an organization (questionable derailment) were thwarted and I found myself starting again from ground up – only this time, rather than my personal life it was my professional life. So, back to classifieds as I sought anxiously to rebuild. I was thrown into a series of challenges that I believe were there to cause me to SEEK provisions from the true source. Many a tear I cried as I, a recovering control-freak, had to sit on my hands and NOT make things happen in the world that wrapped around me. But each new position brought just enough provision and with provision, many new abilities. This most recent one seems to take the cake though. As my recent work at an orchard was drawing to a close due to the season ending, my anxious heart was stayed as my boss emphatically stated, ‘Do not be anxious for the perfect job will come at just the perfect time and it will be the perfect provision for you!’ Sure enough – in the 11th hour, this job came. I was doing what I enjoyed – re-using much of my former giftings, in a casual environment, flexible schedule, amazing networking opportunities . . . But to my dismay, the compensation was questionable as it was an independent non-profit and it was struggling for funding. Lessons learned hard, I started to grumble – but thankfully recovered quickly when all of a sudden a strange series of events took place. I had gotten a call denying funds – I felt my heart sink but mustered up giving it to God then, within the hour my personal cell rang – it was another company that I had applied to but never heard from – they were doing a second call for interviews ‘something’ had fallen through with their first choice – to which I agreed to take an interview – shortly after this – one of the girls I worked with, laid a resume upon my desk, “know that you have filled this position but you may want to keep this gal handy – she looks like she could be a good candidate for the future . . . “ Long story short, I went on the interview, was able to share something that I had just had to take a crash course on learning about – which I believe helped land me the job. The resume that was placed on my desk was followed up with and not only did she go in for an interview (waiting to hear what happened) but she and I developed a friendship while I was strategically trying to interview her without bringing her in physically. I found another friend of mine that had interviewed for that job previously and reconnected with her as she has already started working with them on a temp basis and just today, at my new job – I discovered several projects that are very similar to the many I had just trained for with this past job. It truly WAS the perfect job as it trained me for the next one waiting for me.
Could it really be that easy? Could it be that all we really need to do is just place our trust and walk in faith that we will eventually be brought to the many things that are just waiting to be given to us? All I have to say it . . . make good choices today . . . you might be surprised by what it blesses you with.
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
'Turning the Page'
So, perhaps 2008 will be a year of revival to many.
As I wrote to a friend recently, I had a smile about my face as I slowly turn that calendar page – relishing the lifting off the old and the pulling in of the new. No fancy parties - no confetti and noise makers - just me, my calendar and a fluffy pillow as I turned the page and put 2007 to bed. It's amazing how even the smallest arm gesture can make to most significant of change to one's being.
Another friend of mine shared that this seemingly simple reference of turning the page was used by him as he, a Responder had a rather horrific emergency call. Turning the page to the next CALL somehow signified MOVING ON from the last situation.
As the New Year Resolutions fill the airwaves from tv to radio - many revolving around weight loss and the need for more excercise, it's amazing what just that one arm work-out will do for you - just turn that page from all the old to all the new - from all the negative to all the positive.
I know that I personally have a full calendar for 2008 already - all of the things I allowed be put on hold due to fog that clouded my sole.
It's already a great start . . . make good choices . . .
As I wrote to a friend recently, I had a smile about my face as I slowly turn that calendar page – relishing the lifting off the old and the pulling in of the new. No fancy parties - no confetti and noise makers - just me, my calendar and a fluffy pillow as I turned the page and put 2007 to bed. It's amazing how even the smallest arm gesture can make to most significant of change to one's being.
Another friend of mine shared that this seemingly simple reference of turning the page was used by him as he, a Responder had a rather horrific emergency call. Turning the page to the next CALL somehow signified MOVING ON from the last situation.
As the New Year Resolutions fill the airwaves from tv to radio - many revolving around weight loss and the need for more excercise, it's amazing what just that one arm work-out will do for you - just turn that page from all the old to all the new - from all the negative to all the positive.
I know that I personally have a full calendar for 2008 already - all of the things I allowed be put on hold due to fog that clouded my sole.
It's already a great start . . . make good choices . . .
'The FOG'
‘Derive happiness in oneself from a good day's work, from illuminating the fog that surrounds us.’ ~ Henri Matisse
The weather has been unusually sporadic these days. Not necessarily unusual as the Chicago area is known for it’s wide range in weather patterns all in one day . . . but it has been almost eerie as the city has had many days of dense fog. Driving home the other night, a few things went through my head. Although I struggled to SEE, I felt an odd sense of peace – kind of like when your mind falls asleep yet you are in auto pilot and eventually get to where you are going despite the fact that your mind has completely turned off to the technicals of the actual drive. For the first time in a long time, even though I had this blanket of fog wrapped around me – even though I could not SEE but a few feet in front of me, I had this PEACE as I drove home to my little farm house. Although the roads were much harder to maneuver as the landscape opened to the many farm fields, I happened upon recognizable landmarks every now and then and this continued to reassure me that I was moving along in the right manner. Again, this did not seem to alarm me but rather reassure me that for the first time in a very long time – perhaps EVER, I truly believe I FELT my ‘bearings’.
No big surprise, but I looked up bearings in the dictionary – the definition I was seeming to understand about this word reads as such: an awareness of one's position or situation relative to one's surroundings.
I shared something with a friend of mine – about the way I had been feeling for so long with everything moving so quickly in my life. Many things had been clouding my vision – the struggle between the head and the heart – the spiritual and the flesh.
All of a sudden, the FOG was like a straight jacket that bound me for a time of realization. Perhaps it was BECAUSE of this physical fog that my spiritual senses were heightened ultimately lifting me out of this emotional fog that I have been in for quite some time. It’s interesting how tight our world becomes when the atmosphere lowers itself to our level. Under normal conditions a bounty of freedom awaits one who is able to rise to such heights – a place I choose to live. However, when the reverse takes place – the heavenlies, brought into our realm – where many choose to reside, become an indefinable CONTRAINT that is placed around us causing us to focus on the things that are directly in front of us – almost like the blinders we see on horses that are made to traipse people around in those city horse-drawn carriages – without them, many a horse, feeling overwhelmed and panic, would run ramped through the streets wreaking havoc for themselves and the lives of the many they come in contact with.
‘An awareness of one's position or situation relative to one's surroundings.’ I feel that I am finally reaching a point in my life where I am understanding my position – my purpose, if you will. In finding this understanding, I am beginning to understand that while my PHYSICAL SURROUNDING may change at a moments notice, this new awareness gives me peace and allows me to relate to ANY surrounding.
May your current fog’s be lifted as you grow in your own understanding . . . make good choices . . .
The weather has been unusually sporadic these days. Not necessarily unusual as the Chicago area is known for it’s wide range in weather patterns all in one day . . . but it has been almost eerie as the city has had many days of dense fog. Driving home the other night, a few things went through my head. Although I struggled to SEE, I felt an odd sense of peace – kind of like when your mind falls asleep yet you are in auto pilot and eventually get to where you are going despite the fact that your mind has completely turned off to the technicals of the actual drive. For the first time in a long time, even though I had this blanket of fog wrapped around me – even though I could not SEE but a few feet in front of me, I had this PEACE as I drove home to my little farm house. Although the roads were much harder to maneuver as the landscape opened to the many farm fields, I happened upon recognizable landmarks every now and then and this continued to reassure me that I was moving along in the right manner. Again, this did not seem to alarm me but rather reassure me that for the first time in a very long time – perhaps EVER, I truly believe I FELT my ‘bearings’.
No big surprise, but I looked up bearings in the dictionary – the definition I was seeming to understand about this word reads as such: an awareness of one's position or situation relative to one's surroundings.
I shared something with a friend of mine – about the way I had been feeling for so long with everything moving so quickly in my life. Many things had been clouding my vision – the struggle between the head and the heart – the spiritual and the flesh.
All of a sudden, the FOG was like a straight jacket that bound me for a time of realization. Perhaps it was BECAUSE of this physical fog that my spiritual senses were heightened ultimately lifting me out of this emotional fog that I have been in for quite some time. It’s interesting how tight our world becomes when the atmosphere lowers itself to our level. Under normal conditions a bounty of freedom awaits one who is able to rise to such heights – a place I choose to live. However, when the reverse takes place – the heavenlies, brought into our realm – where many choose to reside, become an indefinable CONTRAINT that is placed around us causing us to focus on the things that are directly in front of us – almost like the blinders we see on horses that are made to traipse people around in those city horse-drawn carriages – without them, many a horse, feeling overwhelmed and panic, would run ramped through the streets wreaking havoc for themselves and the lives of the many they come in contact with.
‘An awareness of one's position or situation relative to one's surroundings.’ I feel that I am finally reaching a point in my life where I am understanding my position – my purpose, if you will. In finding this understanding, I am beginning to understand that while my PHYSICAL SURROUNDING may change at a moments notice, this new awareness gives me peace and allows me to relate to ANY surrounding.
May your current fog’s be lifted as you grow in your own understanding . . . make good choices . . .
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
The Ruler
There is a special person in my life . . . one who, I fully believe, was SENT to me, to be a teacher . . . a ‘guide’, if you will, someone who – when called to - walks in unfathomable wisdom. Many of my recent ‘truths’ were unearthed because of my journey with this personal guide. Much of what I will eventually share here will most likely contain lessons that were shared through this ‘guide’. Such is the case with “The Ruler”.
One day, not so long ago, my three children sat with us in the family room of my old house. My eldest – my son was sharing a story about how his friend was able to do something that he was not BECAUSE this friend’s parent said it was OK to do so.” We shared that this particular thing might be ok on that end – but not in this home. Like all kids, my son’s age, he asked, “Who’s Right?” The answer he got: “BOTH are . . . based on the RULER.” I was then asked to get 3 pieces of paper, making 3 different rulers – unbeknownst to the kids the ‘INCH’ was different on all 3 rulers. The kids were then asked to go measure a couple of household items. When they were done (I had to assist my youngest) they were asked to tell us what the measurement of each item was. To their surprise – because of the different INCH ruler, each of their answers were different. When we told them WHY this was, they said, “But WHO’s is RIGHT?” Their answer was again, “All of you are right – BASED on YOUR RULER”. Then they were asked to find our STANDARD RULER and compare. They were then asked what the majority of the people would recognize as CORRECT. They all pointed to the standard ruler. We shared that an example of a standard rule was like those which police have to uphold – something that ALL have to live under. We pointed out those rules are not so standard, but rather HOUSE RULES – rules that are based on individual house morals and faith – much like my son’s friend’s rules. We then pointed to the BIBLE, and said, “THAT, is OUR STANDARD RULER and that is what we BASE our rules on. We shared with the kids that because people have different beliefs and standards, we cannot JUDGE their choices. Our kids were told that what we wanted them to understand is that their job is always to follow OUR RULES in THIS house and OUT OF this house for they had to WALK UNDER our house rules until they were old enough to walk under their own rules. They were told that there will always be times when rules will appear different from house to house and they needed to understand what THEY were to follow. – that they were to use our rules as a SOUNDING BOARD to finding understanding in another’s.
This little activity later got me thinking about perspective again – let’s face it – it truly is about perspective – how one’s perception of something becomes his reality. I thought about how I had spent a good portion of my younger days thinking I was ‘all that’ and how – based on MY rulings, I often voiced how people should and shouldn’t live their life. It’s amazing what we waste our time on and then again to try and find justification for it. I didn’t have a clue back then . . . only just now beginning to get one.
The true reality is that everyone of us has a perception, based on how we have lived, based on the experiences we have gone through. In recognizing this, one must also see that there is ‘perception limitation’ based on a LACK of experience – if one has not had to go through something, one cannot gather even the slimmest perception of that reality. I have been accused many times recently for appearing to be ‘changing’ the way I live my life . . . damn straight, I am, and I’m looking forward to continuing to change in the years to come.
While this has left me with a far greater understanding of how I need to live my personal life, it has also made me realize areas that I still need to look into for greater understanding for I wonder, is there ever really a Standard Rule? We believe what we perceive and, if we are true seekers, our beliefs will continue to change as our perceptions of the world changes. But as I continue to measure my material items by the traditional measurement – a choice made out of sheer laziness to learn the new system, the rest of the world is converting to metric and I am left wondering, “WHO will eventually be “wrong”?
Just some things to ponder . . . make good choices today.
One day, not so long ago, my three children sat with us in the family room of my old house. My eldest – my son was sharing a story about how his friend was able to do something that he was not BECAUSE this friend’s parent said it was OK to do so.” We shared that this particular thing might be ok on that end – but not in this home. Like all kids, my son’s age, he asked, “Who’s Right?” The answer he got: “BOTH are . . . based on the RULER.” I was then asked to get 3 pieces of paper, making 3 different rulers – unbeknownst to the kids the ‘INCH’ was different on all 3 rulers. The kids were then asked to go measure a couple of household items. When they were done (I had to assist my youngest) they were asked to tell us what the measurement of each item was. To their surprise – because of the different INCH ruler, each of their answers were different. When we told them WHY this was, they said, “But WHO’s is RIGHT?” Their answer was again, “All of you are right – BASED on YOUR RULER”. Then they were asked to find our STANDARD RULER and compare. They were then asked what the majority of the people would recognize as CORRECT. They all pointed to the standard ruler. We shared that an example of a standard rule was like those which police have to uphold – something that ALL have to live under. We pointed out those rules are not so standard, but rather HOUSE RULES – rules that are based on individual house morals and faith – much like my son’s friend’s rules. We then pointed to the BIBLE, and said, “THAT, is OUR STANDARD RULER and that is what we BASE our rules on. We shared with the kids that because people have different beliefs and standards, we cannot JUDGE their choices. Our kids were told that what we wanted them to understand is that their job is always to follow OUR RULES in THIS house and OUT OF this house for they had to WALK UNDER our house rules until they were old enough to walk under their own rules. They were told that there will always be times when rules will appear different from house to house and they needed to understand what THEY were to follow. – that they were to use our rules as a SOUNDING BOARD to finding understanding in another’s.
This little activity later got me thinking about perspective again – let’s face it – it truly is about perspective – how one’s perception of something becomes his reality. I thought about how I had spent a good portion of my younger days thinking I was ‘all that’ and how – based on MY rulings, I often voiced how people should and shouldn’t live their life. It’s amazing what we waste our time on and then again to try and find justification for it. I didn’t have a clue back then . . . only just now beginning to get one.
The true reality is that everyone of us has a perception, based on how we have lived, based on the experiences we have gone through. In recognizing this, one must also see that there is ‘perception limitation’ based on a LACK of experience – if one has not had to go through something, one cannot gather even the slimmest perception of that reality. I have been accused many times recently for appearing to be ‘changing’ the way I live my life . . . damn straight, I am, and I’m looking forward to continuing to change in the years to come.
While this has left me with a far greater understanding of how I need to live my personal life, it has also made me realize areas that I still need to look into for greater understanding for I wonder, is there ever really a Standard Rule? We believe what we perceive and, if we are true seekers, our beliefs will continue to change as our perceptions of the world changes. But as I continue to measure my material items by the traditional measurement – a choice made out of sheer laziness to learn the new system, the rest of the world is converting to metric and I am left wondering, “WHO will eventually be “wrong”?
Just some things to ponder . . . make good choices today.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)